Trip down Memory Lane

Feature Photo by Lukas on

I remember when I lost all control and ability to manage my outwardly expressed and seen behaviour.  It was crippling as I skated far to close for human comfort, on my black hole of an abyss, almost obliviating but not quite thanks to my stubborn realism nature that always kicks in forcing me to become aware and face my ignorances.

I will always face whatever is necessary eventually in order to survive, or self-destructive tendencies become the price which has become too heavy a cost and burden to carry……. I just need to rehabilitate myself.

Every resource of communication seemed inaccessible at the start of this journey earliest posted entry being, February 2016, a complete malfunction when my clock lost the sense of reality, making time the challenge and kryptonite.

The best visual I can use to try to replicate for someone to comprehend what it looks like when this individual was not in her right mind, is something commonly seen in the movies, a rat placed in a bucket, trapped, being cooked from the outside.

When reading this collection of writings, remember this is the story of what societies literal words and way of understanding, is the mind of a neurologically and psychologically disabled females fight or flight for survival.

Table of Contents

hello spring handwritten paper
A letter I wrote a special General Practitioner in Spring 2018 – Photo by Alena Koval on
cold person woman water
1st June 2016; the process of becoming more aware – Photo by Gratisography on
grey metal hammer
17th June 2018; immediate thoughts after taking the Ritvo Autism Asperger Diagnostic Scale-revised (RAADS) – Photo by Pixabay on
animal animal photography canidae canine
28th April 2018; reflecting back when a bereavement the day before, shut down my ability to communicate – Photo by Pixabay on
Trip down memory lane March to July 2016 – 08/07/2018 – picture taken and redrawn from my journal in 2016, when words couldn’t explain
Trip down memory Lane 27/02/2016 – 05/07/2018 – photo from personal collection